Tag Archives: Dogs

Marley And No Rest Time!

3 Mar

Friday’s with Marley…

I was on the phone when Marley walked in the room, she flopped down on the floor with a loud snort. As I was finishing up with my call, the noises got louder and along with barking, backward sneezes, and lip licking there where many eye rolls .

I hung up and said… Marley, for God’s sakes what do you want ? You are being far too rude and far too annoying for my liking!

“Well, what do you expect she said, I am over worked, under paid and I’m not given an opportunity to rest on my days off, just like Prince William. We have no down time or better said, no me-time”

I’m speechless, you and Prince William, no rest on days off?…Thinking I might still be able to step out of crazy before it gets crazier.

But…

…Quickly realizing I’m already in the quagmire of crazy and sinking fast with no hope of escaping…

What do you mean, you are not given an opportunity to rest? You rest for hours every single day…In fact, I question whether you even know the difference between day and night.

…She stands up, indignant… “Do you realize how hard I work? I don’t even have time to be polite.” I’M ENTITLED she barks louder, I’M ENTITLED, I’m the victim in mi casa.”

…Excuse me Marley, did I hear you correctly?

……………No time to be polite? …Entitled?

You, You…YOU, a victim? You are definitely barking up the wrong tree today!

“That reminds me, did you notice those unwanted bitches around the tree I like to visit? Can’t believe the level of narcissism in the world today!”

Marley please!

“Well at least you’re being polite…But that doesn’t get me what I want, when I want it.”

Marley, please focus….I continue with an inspirational quote hoping for an enlightened moment.
“Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within.” Helen Keller

” I agree with Helen she said, if you would give me a snack, happiness would be within me”

I turned on my heels, grabbed my car keys and headed for the door, with hopes that crazy wouldn’t follow…

IMG_3359

Marley and The Candidate!

16 Nov

Friday’s with Marley….

While outside listening to the morning silence, a smile appears on my face without effort. The warm weather rolls over my skin like an ultra soft cashmere tee and the slight breeze is to my back as I turn to the East while sipping my first cup of coffee and say words of gratitude.

I am in the warmth of old dear friends. The kind of friends that love you because of your faults, not in spite of your faults. Again, we are blessed with beautiful weather, warm ocean water and endless topics to debate and talk until your eyes fall out of your head.

I return home and the first thing I hear is Marley barking at me about wanting to be a Presidential candidate.

What? …A candidate?…What are you talking about???

Marley licks her lips, walks with a swagger and says, “I want to host Saturday Night Live and it seems you have to be a Presidential candidate for such said position …My talents would finally get full recognition.

“You’re about qualified enough to host Snausages Night Live. Probably not even live, come to think of it, I think taped media is really more your forte.”

“I’m glad you agree” Marley said while smiling toward the other end of the room.
“Why” I asked suspiciously and joined her gaze to the left.
“Because I just filmed this conversion for my new Vlog, called “You Cant Spell Marley Without ME”. Apologies in advance if I edit out your part.”
“That doesn’t even make sense. There’s no “me” in your name”
“What do you mean? There’s an M and an E. ME”
“That’s not how spelling works”
“It will be when I’m President” she responded, as she took her phone and went upstairs to edit her video.

IMG_2825

Marley and The Reset Button!

12 Oct

Friday’s with Marley…

Standing in the kitchen in front of the computer with one eye on the coffee machine, waiting for my first cup of peace and clarity, when Marley saunters into the kitchen.

Good morning Marley, your breakfast is in your bowl I say with a warm smile…She glances up at me and continues towards her breakfast.

Marley, I said good morning, it would be nice hear a good morning back.

She barks at me with something about a lot on her mind and since I never told her to say good morning she hasn’t done anything wrong, acting very snarky

I roll my eyes and take a deep breath clutching tightly to my serenity while asking…

…What could possibly be on your mind so early in the morning that has put you in such a cantankerous k-9 mood?

As she finished gobbling up her breakfast while licking her lips, she looked up at me and said….”Not that you would care (burp) but I’m in need of a vacation.”

I turned on my heels and headed back up stairs…A vacation from what, I say under my breath…

“See, that is exactly what I’m talking about. Do you think it’s easy chasing ideas all around, trying to be creative in this challenging business environment? And not to mention, no me time to recharge, rejuvenate, and renew. I’m busy busy busy. There is no rest for the weary”

Marley, aren’t you being over dramatic? And by the way those ideas you’re chasing have bushy tails and are called squirrels..I’m just saying

But….On the other hand…

…If you really want to reset your balance button, there is nothing like exercising outdoors. Breathing in positivity and exhaling negativity, staying present in the moment and to be among the beauty of nature, I think there is nothing better! It’s like a vacation without a hotel bill…What do say Marley, do you want to hike with me today?

Marley turns and walks to her favorite chair and says, “ok, unless of course I get a better invitation.”

IMG_2829

Marley and The Bitch!

15 Sep

Friday’s with Marley…
I’ve just returned from a hike, started to make my “to do list” when I hear moaning from upstairs.

Marley are you OK….What is going on?

Marley waddles downstairs, flops down on the rug and with her eyes shut says…

…I don’t understand why I’m gaining weight. I watch what I eat.

Well Marley, maybe we can figure this out together before getting too worked-up.

For example….
…..I met Agnes while on vacation. She was a little bit of a thing with much pep in her walk. Her mother told me that Agnes is very disciplined. She eats two teaspoons of kibble in the morning and three teaspoons of kibble in the evening along with hiking three miles, five times a week.

…So tell me Marley what is YOUR disciplined routine?

She rolls over, opens her eyes and says…I wake up early…I move from my bed to yours….

Yep go on….

I wait for you to have your first cup of coffee and then I eat a big bowl of breakfast…

Yep, Ok….

I return to your bed…And when you go off to exercise I move to a chair in the living room.

Perfect, what else?

When you finally return, I eat a treat and move to the living room sofa.

Yep, yep…

By the time you are done with what ever you do, I eat another bowl of food…

Alrigh-ty, anything else?

Yep…I curl-up on the living chair so not to disrupt my digestion before going upstairs to bed.

Marley…All you do is eat and sleep…And p.s. eating what ever you want with your eyes open is not watching what you eat, I’m just saying!

Marley gives a snort, gives me the stink eye and says Agnes is the reason why people call female dogs bitches!

IMG_2691

Halloween!

30 Oct

Dear Readers,

 

I am going to say it out loud…I Hate Halloween! 

 

I know how it makes me sound like an anti-candy person, which I am NOT. Which is completely ridiculous to anyone who knows me, I could not survive without some kind of (sweetly, sweetfull, sweet-a-licious) indulgence everyday if not twice a day!

 

One would think with such a sweet tooth and sweet thoughts this would be MY holiday…keep reading!

 

I never have liked Halloween even as a kid growing up in Rochester, NY. Any Rochester child knows one of the most important decisions regarding a Halloween costume is; can you wear it over a snowsuit (will it still fit?) and will it lose its impact?

 

Do not get what all the fuss fun is all about.

 

I hate having my doorbell ringing every five minutes. I am a generous person, I love giving, I love giving candy…just ask Thing one and Thing two? With one hand on the bible, swearing under oath, they would scream from their sugar high…”YES!” I give them lots and lots of (candy/cookies) treats.

My dogs’ staffs go crazy with every footstep, voice and doorbell they hear! Inside my home a barking-fest, giving pause to even the biggest dog lover a question of my staff’s existence. Poor Elwood and poor Augie, thinking we are under attack, bless their protective hearts!…Maybe my Halloween blessing will be hurricane Sandy?

Image

Elwood and Augie standing guard!

Image

Target -1st floor

Image

Target – 1st Floor

 

Do not get what all the bother fun is all about.

Halloween is a time for the truly gifted and artistic mothers to shine brightly (I am definitely Not one of them). YOU own the cluster of streets in your neighborhood, YOU own the Halloween party at school.  The Halloween talent light shines brightly on you, not your child (hmmm) Please do not confuse those who make a costume with those who CREATE a costume. Halloween CREATIONS would bring any Broadway producer down to his knees green with envy (no pun intended.)

Image

Target – 2nd Floor

 

Do not get what all the aggravation fun is all about.

Halloween is a time when some adult women use it as an excuse to dress like sluts their fantasies.  Men (equal opportunist) use it as the same excuse, a gynecologist or Hugh Hefner…and they always think they are so original and oh so funny ewww. 

Image

The Mall 10.27.12

Do not get what all the commotion fun is all about.

But what you all do not know (and must) about Halloween in Rochester, NY or I should say trick or treating at my house, MY FAMILY. After a night of hard work, running from house to house, screaming trick or treat at adults, getting rewarded handsomely with sweet candy to add to our already way too heavy pillowcases filled with sugared treats. Upon our arrival back home (I and my sister)…  would get greeted at our front door by my Mother with a smile on her face. We would empty all our candy out and Mother would have us pick six of our most favorite pieces of candy we wanted to keep (more then enough for any one child) and then for the rest of our sweet stash  (pounds and pounds of candy) my Mother would take it to the pediatric floors at our local hospitals for children who were unable to enjoy one of the most fun nights’ a child could possibly have!

 

 

Ok Ok…maybe there is some (lots) of fun in this orange and black holiday!  For I will be thinking of my beautiful, sweet and generous mother tomorrow with a smile on my face as the doorbell rings, the dogs bark and children screaming trick or treat! For it was the love of my Mother that made everyday sweeter for me and for so many children in hospitals on Halloween!

 

Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today… Halloween “ready and able” … a bowl filled with candy, 2 dog crates office cubicles, a huge sugar rush and a witch’s hat on my head! (Pun intended)

 

Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!

 

Kindest regards,

 

Asklotta

 

President and CEO

 

CBCorp

Image 

 

 

 

Loyalty and Forgiveness?

25 Jul
Dear Readers,
 
Cleveland was in an official heat wave last week; As I sat in front of my computer I could feel sweat rolling down the back of my neck making my hair stick to my skin. My shirt looked as if I just ran through the sprinkler. It was 98 degrees in the shade; the humidity was so thick it felt like I could cut it with a knife and then my favorite dog jumped up in to my lap. I now had a 35-pound fur blanket on top of me! Difficult believing he was not as hot as I was if not hotter but go figure. I pushed him down and he starts licking my ankles, loyalty that’s what it was, loyalty! No matter how hot and uncomfortable he was Elwood would not allow his own discomfort stand in the way of trying to take good care of me, the translation in any language; love and loyalty! 
 
Which brings me to today’s post and question: Is it reasonable for humans to think of other humans (in their life) should have the same loyalty as a dog?  Should there be no limits to someone’s love and acceptance? Or (if limits) where and when should those limits be placed? How many times should limits be allowed to be crossed? Some say…love is limitless or Ali McGraw’s famous line “love means never having to say your sorry.” 
 
I say; you cannot un-ring a bell….
 
In my opinion certain people talk about forgiveness like a badminton game, batting the birdie back and forth until there is a winner, all so meaningless. Oprah talked about forgiveness, as in forgiving people who have done unspeakable acts not for them but for you. But I think that is something completely different and that is not the kind of forgiveness I am talking about today. That sounds more like radical acceptance; accepting what your life is with love. “Radical acceptance refers to your relationship with the reality of “what is” in the present moment. By arriving honestly and with openness to this moment’s experience, you create the possibility of then responding with wisdom and compassion.” 
 
Maybe for some people forgiving someone you love is actually (enabling) NOT accepting what is, but instead, standing in the quagmire of wants, submerged in a state of denial, fueling fantasies of a perfect life.
 
Image 
 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today in a state of reality, of what truly is and I peacefully accept it all.
 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what not to do!
 
Kindness regards,
 
Asklotta
 
President and CEO
 
CBCorp

Hostile Takeover!

3 Jul
Dear Readers,
 
Its official CBCorp is under a hostile takeover from my silent investor! 
 
Let me back up just a little…last Friday I had minor knee surgery to repair a torn meniscus in my right knee from all the running I have done and continued to do even though the pain should have clearly made me stop. But as I ran through the pain in to the world of a runners nirvana of peace and harmony I eventually had my “come to Jesus” moment when getting out of bed in the morning and placing my right foot on the floor became as painful as seeing a 50+ year old woman dressed as if she was 16, oh so very painful experience! So my silent investor (bless his heart) has taken time off from work to care for me, and the corporation (bless his sweet heart!)
 
Except….
 
NOW…the staff is under his dictatorship due to my physical inabilities, he is treating them like D O G  S.  Well I know they are dogs, but they didn’t know that until now. I was planning on telling them (honest) but not until a few more years, or at least until Tommy’s retirement and he received his doggie reward in the sky.  
 
Mr. Silent has started to make waves in what I thought was a very calm and smooth corporation. With too much time on his hands he has started the process of doing a complete head to toe financial and operational review on CBCorp.  Pulling financial statements out of files (bless his heart, damn it!) Talking on the phone with what I thought was all ready contracted soon to be services. I am starting to believe there is a mole in my corporation a sort of “deep throat’ informant for Mr. Silent is making noises, asking questions like I’ve never heard before. I feel as if I have new hurdles before me.
 
Mr. Silent has noticed missing documents of company expenditures for the past six months. His probing eye is reviewing every program and entitlement no matter how big or small. Nervous of course about catching flak about programs that were “grandfathered” in, that he might have been completely unaware of, reminding myself I need to save my energy I am in recovery mode.  Fearing that fun and delightful programs that were once enjoyed will get changed, slashed, or fined along with implementing higher standards for approval with more guidelines and additional limits  (bless his financial savoy heart, Sh$t!)
 
As of today it is still a slow and painful process to walk and still unable to drive myself around town to get what I need to get done. I call out sweetheart…are you doing anything? I wait patiently…oh sweetheart, SWEETHEART where are you?  I give up and go back to bed. About 30 minutes later Mr. Silent shows up and I ask him politely if he would mind being my part-time chauffeur this morning that I am badly in need of?  He immediately answers, “You mean driving miss daisy?”  I say nothing and scramble to get dress not wanting to waste anymore time or for him to bury himself back in my invoices, bills or ledger entries.  One would think getting him out of the office (home) would at least distract him from the stabbing and slashing budget dance he had been so beautifully choreographing all weekend.

We are now in the car, Mr. Silent in the driver’s seat and me as the co-pilot, ahhh all is well or at least I thought so until I heard, “how much do you have in your checking account?” I pretend not to hear Mr. Silent. He repeats the question “how much do you have” I interrupt with goodness I don’t know that off the top of my head. Mr. Silent says, “Pull out your check book and look.” Again I don’t blink, move or say a word. I turn the music louder and start to sing! (Bless his helpful heart, God Damn it, I’m going crazy!) 
 
Well, as my mother would say, “be thankful for the help” and “its better then a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.” …hmmm well… maybe!
 
 
Asklotta and staff remain strong in fighting off the hostile takeover to keep MINDING YOUR BUSINESS! AND reminding myself if my left knee ever needs to have surgery….I will learn to walk on my hands!
 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
 
Kindest regards,
 
Asklotta
 
President and CEO
 
CBCorp

Image

My Views!

22 Jun

Dear Readers,

Today (TGIF) Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS with my views!

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Hope you have enjoyed my views! Wishing you a happy and safe weekend on my son’s birthday!

Again, it has been a pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!

 

Kindest regards,

Asklotta

President and CEO

CBCorp

“People are born so…”

15 May

Dear Readers,

 

I recently received “A nice story” from a dear friend…. As a dog lover, I truly believe it speaks volumes (simply and kindly) and hence why I surround myself with a staff of three! So thank you so much my dear friend, it puts a smile on my face, a calm in my soul and reminder of what I need to keep learning from my staff!  AND guess what, I’m sure it comes to no surprise to anyone; My Staff never loses their patience’s with me!

 

A nice story:

 

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog’s owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.  I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn’t do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker ‘s family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker’s transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker’s Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.

Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ”I know why.”

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I’d never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said, “People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life — like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?” The Six-year-old continued,

”Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don’t have to stay as long.”

 

Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

Live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Speak kindly.

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you’re not.

 

Today CBCorp staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS and demand that you “Love generously, Care deeply” and “Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride” in life!

 

And sometimes life can be just that simple…

 

Again, it has been my staff’s pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!

 

Kindest regards,

 

Asklotta

 

President and CEO

 

CBCorp 

Image 

%d bloggers like this: