Tag Archives: Death

Everyone Has A Story!

19 May

A few Saturday mornings ago…I was sitting at my computer trying hard to ignore a very happy , a very talkative workman at my house.

…I heard him talking which is certainly not unusual for him. Though it seemed like a one-side conversation and with all this technology these days, people seem to be doing that. I was so hoping he was talking on the phone.  I was trying hard not to look in his direction and kept very silent.

BUT…

Ignoring him, not looking in his direction and staying silent was not working for me that day.  He (Michael) kept talking,  I soon realized, Michael, had a story to tell.

Still seated at my computer, I looked over at Michael now he was on all fours, laying a piece of canvas down on the floor.

The chatter in my brain was busy at work while looking at Michael. The inner voice kept saying, why is he bothering with the canvas? My house looks like a bomb exploded. I have boxes stacked to the ceiling, beds striped and leaning against bedroom walls.  Kitchen cabinets empty, furniture bubbled wrapped and staged in the front of the house…In other words, a huge pile of  a hot mess!

Trust me on this one, a little more dirt tracked in my house from the bottoms of someone’s shoes was not going to be noticed.

I’m sure you’ve lived this visual at least once in your life.

AND..

Michael still on his hands and knees, half in and half out of the house, now had my full attention He was telling me how he once had dogs like mine and how they reminded him of a terrible tragedy in his life.

In 2002 his whole family died in a house fire, his wife (high school sweetheart), a son (4 1/2) and a daughter (3 1/2).

I said nothing, he had a story to tell…

He was away on a boys hunting trip for just a few days. His wife had decided she and the kids would stay with her parents at their home (thinking life would be a little easier). The trip was a success and Michael was returning home but had a later departure than originally planned. He talked with his family on the drive home. A snow storm was moving in and Michael needed to get up very early the next morning to plow driveways (his second business). So the decision was made his family would stay at his in-laws for one more night. His son wanted him to pick him up on his way home but Michael said, “No, stay with mommy, I have to get up very early to plow driveways in the morning.”

A few hours later…He received the call.

Apparently, everyone had at one point made it outside but they went back in the house not knowing everyone had made it out.

His son was found dead crouched down between the toilet and the sink.

His daughter dead under her bed and his wife in the bathroom with her son.

They all died of smoke inhalation.

What Michael was told, when the bathroom  window was opened, it created a backdraft, making the whole house go up in minutes.

The house fire was started by his son who had found his grandmothers cigarette lighter.

My only question to Michael, how, how do you move on from such an awful, painful tragedy?

“Well” he said,

“I threw myself in to my dogs and after a little over a year, I made a decision, I could either stay in pain and in darkness hating God or fill my life with hope, happiness and love.”

He eventually met a wonderful woman who already had a couple of daughters, they married and had two more daughters.

Michael said, “I work long hard days with very little time off for one reason, to provide everything for my four children and for my wife’… “I am filled with gratitude” Michael said, to be able to do what I do for them. Their happiness is my happiness!

I said, Michael, you are a true inspiration regarding living life….My mother would say, “Life is for the living.” And he is certainly living those words.

Michael’s story has forever change my life, strengthening my belief in the human spirit. The desire for love, happiness and joy is far stronger than hate, misery and darkness !

I am filled with gratitude that a happy man, who was on his hands and knees, laying out canvas to protect my already dirty floors, didn’t allow my silence, to silence his story!

God works in mysterious ways!

 

 

 

 

 

My Two Cents Worth!

29 Oct
Dear Readers,

 
This topic is a dicey one… 
 
It was brought to my attention (sweetmotherlover.wordpress.com) regarding a murder in Newark, CA October 3, 2002. I can not say in this moment in time if I had known about it and just forgot or if it didn’t even hit my radar screen at all. But at any rate this is an interesting story. 
 
This is the most perfect time to quote my brilliant mother, “a piece of paper is never too thin it doesn’t have two sides.” as you will learn.
 
As I was writing a question kept rising to the surface…In a just and moral society, is it possible to push someone too far emotionally, bullying, humiliation, degradation? If the answer is yes, then in a just and moral society should we hold them accountable for their actions? 
 
Before rendering an opinion, please wait and indulge me a little as I lay out the facts… 
 
Gwen Amber Rose Araujo – born Edward Araujo, Jr. “American teenage pre-operative trans woman”
 
Witness account of the circumstances of Araujo’s death
 
Araujo, who was undergoing hormone therapy and going by the name of Gwen Amber Rose Araujo at the time,[7][8] met Michael Magidson, Jose Merél, Jaron Nabors, and Jason Cazares in the summer of 2002.[9] She was reported to have engaged in oral sex with Magidson and anal sex with Merél.[10] She allegedly claimed to be menstruating and during sex would push her partners’ hands away from her private area to prevent them from discovering that she had male sex organs.[11] On October 3, 2002, she attended a party at a house rented by Merél and his brother, Paul Merél.[12][13] Also in attendance at the party were Magidson, Jose Merél, Nabors, Cazares, Paul Merél, Paul Merél’s girlfriend Nicole Brown, and Emmanual Merél.
 
At the party on October 3, 2002 she was discovered, by forced inspection (conducted by Brown[14]), to have male sex organs, following which the men with whom she had sexual relations with became violent. Magidson put Araujo in a chokehold.[15] Later, he punched Araujo in the face and began to choke her, but was pulled off by others.[14] At some point after that, Paul Merél, Emmanuel Merél, and Brown left the house.[15][16] Jose Merél struck Araujo in the head with a can of food and a frying pan.[15][17] Nabors and Cazares left in Magidson’s truck to go to Cazares’s house to get shovels and a pickaxe.[15][18]
 
When Nabors and Cazares returned, Araujo was still conscious and sitting on the couch.[15] At some point, the assault resumed. Magidson kneed Araujo in the head against the living room wall, rendering her unconscious.[15][19] Cazares kicked Araujo.[19] After this, Araujo was taken to the garage of the home. Nabors testified that Magidson strangled Araujo with a rope and that Cazares struck Araujo with a shovel,[9] but Magidson testified that it was Nabors who strangled Araujo and struck her with the shovel,[20] and Cazares testified that he never struck Araujo and did not see Araujo die.[9] Most accounts have cleaning blood out of the carpet at the time that she was strangled.[citation needed] Araujo was then hog-tied, wrapped in a blanket, and placed in the bed of a pick-up truck. They then drove Araujo’s body four hours away and buried her near the Sierra Nevada mountains.[21] Araujo’s disappearance and murder went unreported for days.[21] It is not clear at what point during this sequence of events Araujo’s death occurred. However, the autopsy showed that she died from strangulation associated with blunt force trauma to the head.[10]
 
Three defendants testified in this trial — and blamed each other as well as Nabors. On 8 September, the jury announced that it had reached verdicts on two of the three defendants. As Judge Harry Sheppard instructed, the verdicts were kept secret.[26]
 
On 12 September, after the jury announced that it had deadlocked on the third defendant, the verdicts were announced. The defendant on whom the jury had deadlocked was Cazares. Magidson and Merél were each convicted of second-degree murder,[27] but not convicted of the hate crime enhancement allegations.
 
Alameda County Assistant District Attorney Chris Lamiero, who represented the prosecution in the case, undermined criminal intent by commenting:
Gwen being transgender was not a provocative act. He’s [sic] who he [sic] was. However, I would not further ignore the reality that Gwen made some decisions in his [sic] relation with these defendants that were impossible to defend. I don’t think most jurors are going to think it’s OK to engage someone in sexual activity knowing they assume you have one sexual anatomy when you don’t.[28]
– Wikipedia
 
Now here is my two cents…
 
How I see it…this is not a trans gender hate crime/murder. From where I sit it was an act of humiliation. 

 

Magidson and Merél were very happy using Gwen Araujo for sex.  But when they found out they were the ones being duped and being used by Gwen, life turned into a hot mess in record speed. Magidson and Merel were humiliated, their masculinity challenged, turning a situation from a testosterone pleasure zone to a testosterone wild rage… ending with an awful murder. 
 
I am not supporting or even insinuating Magidson and Merél’s awful disguising violent actions that directly lead to Gwen’s death were OK.
 

But I am also not supporting Gwen actions of deception and lies to Magidson and Merél for sex as either OK or acceptable. 

 

I feel the exact same way if someone engaged in sex knowing they were HIV positive and said nothing before hand to their partner. One could almost predict an awful outcome from these actions…

 
I feel it is NEVER OK or justified to use people much less for one’s self-gradification that would surely leave one disgraced and humiliated regardless of gender or sexual orientation!
 
But with that said…

 “two wrongs do not make a right” 
 
But the question still begs…in a moral and just society is it possible to push people too far leaving them free of responsibly for their actions?
 
For I am positive if Gwen gave full disclosure Magidson and Merél she would be alive today and hence why I believe this was not a hate crime. 
 
 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today reminding you kindness, truth and respect is the only road to travel…for everyone’s safety!
 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
 
Kindest regards,
 
Asklotta
 
President and CEO
 
CBCorp  
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“Trash The Dress”

29 Aug
Dear Readers,
 
 
My sister called this morning and the first words out of her mouth, “did you see the Today Show?” Proudly I said, No, I am now a proud card carrying viewer of Good Morning America! 
 
Well she said; have you ever heard of “Trash The Dress?” Again I said No!
 
She went on…Women who do not want their wedding dresses after their lovely weddings “trash the dress” in mud, water, dirt etc., while getting photographed. The Today Show did a segment on Maria Pantazopoulos, a newlywed of only two months put on her wedding dress, went in to a river (to have pictures taken) to “trash the dress” and drowned. The wet dress (of course) became far too heavy for her handle.
 
Have we all truly lost our minds? “Trash The Dress” Have you heard of this completing disgusting form of extravagant destruction or am I the only one in the dark, or at least I was?
 
 
“A Canadian woman drowned in her wedding gown over the weekend posing for “Trash the Dress” photographs.
Maria Pantazopoulos, 30, hired a photographer to take pictures of her wearing her wedding dress in the Ouareau River near Rawdon, Quebec.
When she waded into the water, the dress became heavy, pulling her under and downstream.”
 
“Trash the Dress” is an increasingly popular trend in which brides destroy their wedding dresses after they are married and document the process. Some brides have been known to crawl through mud, splatter themselves with paint, or frequently, jump into water.”
 
The first thing out of my mouth  (truly not proud)… 
 
…This is nature’s way of weeding out the stupid to prevent them from reproducing. 
 
Of course my sister was most displeased with my response and please know I am not saying this wasn’t an awful tragedy and a great lost of human life but come on now. Not only do I think it is just awful to trash a dress costing thousands of dollars as well as, a hugely disguising public display of spoiled rottenness. 
 
Which brings me to my next two questions: 
 
1) Did no one have an IQ above 50 in this outdoor excursion?
2) Did it not occur to anyone that yards and yards of wet heavy material wrapped around a tiny woman (100 pounds) was going to sink her? 
 
My more mindful balanced suggestion adding well needed peace and harmony into this world of ours; Donate the dress to charity, women could get photographed walking in to the charity of their choice in their beautiful wedding dresses making another woman’s dreams come true! 
 
I am now going to make a prediction…the girl’s family will sue the photographer. Placing no responsibility on Ms. Pantazopoulos stupidity and all her bad decisions, (free will) leading up to her tragic death. 
 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today with an IQ above 50, choosing NOT to be in formal wear when in the water!
 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
 
Kindest regards,
 
Asklotta
 
President and CEO
 
CBCorp
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