Tag Archives: Advice

Drunk Posting!

3 Feb

Who out there is getting on Facebook at 1:00 in the morning after a few adult beverages and posting pictures of friends? Well, STOP IT NOW!

You are very close to (being blocked on Facebook) and an intervention that will land you a 30 day stay at The Betty Ford Clinic.

My suggestion if you are…




feeling nostalgic or have had at least one adult beverage…

…Step away from your technology!

Before you damage yourself and friendships (present and future)

It’s too damaging and you cannot un-ring a bell. No matter how much your rational (in the moment) lucid and/or sober self regrets!

Of course, this is just a suggestion for a kinder and more peaceful existence!

Again as always, it is your decision!







29 Jan

OK please tell me it’s not just me….But who else has someone in their life who (#blesstheirheart) over uses # that you just want to scream…




Maybe this is nothing more than



possibly I am





For those of you who are able to

#manage (#nooveruse) do not feel self-conscious….There is a time and a place (#whenandwhere)! And you are in that #blessed place!

BUT for the rest of you…






“Through A Rapist’s Eyes”

18 Jan
Dear Readers,
A friend sent this to me with the instructions to Forward/Share on Facebook. And as I was preparing to do just that, I realized I would be leaving out some very important dear friends and their friends their friends daughters.
So without further delay or fuss please read….
It seems that a lot of attackers use some tactic to get away with violence. Not many people know how to take care of themselves when faced with such a situation. Everyone should read this especially each and every girl in this world.
Through a rapist’s eyes! A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts: 
1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.
3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.
4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots.
5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.
6] Number three is public restrooms.
7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.
1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.
2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and
armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.
5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of
trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.
6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked
7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, and go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be some, where you will go “hmm I must remember that” After reading, forward it to someone you care about, never hurts to be careful in
this crazy world we live in.
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.
2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans: if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit
(doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS, LEAVE.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage: 
a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side, peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. (DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB).
b. If you! U are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard /policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
I’d like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, 
wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well.
Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.
Friends So Please Share….Your one share can Help to spread this information. We share So many Stupid Things on Facebook and ignore these types of things which can save so many lives’s…
Take care.
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today hoping all women will be safe from rape!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

“Pride, My Name is Pride” Poem by Beth Moore

4 Jan
Dear Readers,
Between Christmas and New Year’s, my silent investor and I spent a little time in Dallas visiting friends. In the morning (my favorite time of the day) we were all standing/sitting in their very beautiful kitchen (still) in pajamas, drinking coffee and talking about the up’s and down’s of our collective lives over the years. 
We talked about friends that have remained friends, new friends, past friends, politics (proof we are all friends), movies, books etc. So another words we talked about life and was in that beautiful kitchen for at least a couple of hours! Life is good, it just does not get any sweeter!
We started sharing our favorite inspirations that keep us going and on track. To keep us mindful of the larger picture, to keep us humble, self-correcting and appreciative and hence filled with love and happiness. I thought it was interesting we all carried around something positive and  inspirational to pull-out on “those days” or at “those moments.”
Below is what a friend shared that morning. It is inspirational and very worthy of sharing with all of you, regardless of what you’re wearing or what you’re drinking at this given moment! Personally I think the word “Pride” can be swapped out for “Ego” But its up to you to decide.

Pride – “My Name is Pride” poem by 

Beth Moore
My name is Pride. I am a cheater.
I cheat you of your God-given destiny…
    because you demand your own way.
I cheat you of contentment…
    because you “deserve better than this.”
I cheat you of knowledge…
    because you already know it all.
I cheat you of healing…
    because you are too full of you to forgive.
I cheat you of holiness…
    because you refuse to admit when you are wrong.
I cheat you of vision…
    because you’d rather look in the mirror than out a
I cheat you of genuine friendship…
    because nobody’s going to know the real you.
I cheat you of love…
    because real romance demands sacrifice.
I cheat you of greatness in heaven…
    because you refuse to wash another’s feet on earth.
I cheat you of God’s glory…
    because I convinced you to seek your own.
My name is Pride. I am a cheater.
    You like me because you think I’m always looking out
for you.
I’m looking to make a fool of you.
    God has so much for you, I admit, but don’t worry…
If you stick with me you’ll never know.
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today happy for my friendships and appreciative of everything they have brought to my life!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

Actively Stopping!

10 Dec
Dear Readers,
Below is an insightful quote from Troy of aslongasimsinging.wordpress.com. I will take his advice and I hope you do too!
“In my humble experience, the “magic” of the holidays only happens when you actively stop. Just stop, and allow it to happen for you, instead of because of you.”

-Troy from the blog aslongasiamsinging.wordpress.com
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today actively stopping and allowing it to happen!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

Business Trip, Delta Airlines and Much Laughter!

15 Nov
Dear Readers,

Last Monday 3:22 a.m. RING ring, RING, ring, RING, ring! My cell phone and my silent investor’s cell phone is ringing, buzzing SCREAMING waking us from a sound sleep…I throw back the covers and leap out of bed in a single bound, sprint to my phone in a second and a half and have promise God everything and anything as long as all my children are safe! 
…Delta Airlines recording my/our 6:15 a.m. flight has been canceled.
and now have been confirmed on a 11:00 a.m. flight and my husband has been confirmed on a completely different flight leaving Cleveland 6:45 a.m. we once were traveling together but leave it to the airlines to change that plan, now arriving in OK City five hours apart.
After I am able to start breathing again from the jarring fright and start to process the change in our travel plans my silent investor calls Delta to get us on the same flight, feeling badly of course not wanting to upsetting Delta’s agenda or inconvenience Delta Airlines!
The call to Delta’s reservation desk with a wait time of 20 minutes (I guess we were not the only ones disrupting Delta) while music played while flat on my back with my arm over my eyes. I must confess I was not thinking sweet thoughts about Delta! But I did benefit by allowing me time to gather my thoughts and think about the best way to proceed with exactly what is needed. After a chat with someone trying to be helpful my silent investor has booked us on the same flight out of Cleveland! I do hope Delta doesn’t hold a grudge….
But this is the kind of stuff to anyone who has been reading my blog will know this does not bother me in the least. In fact I see it as God intervening for my own good for there is something HE wants me to do or something I need to avoided…If nothing else sure gives me something to laugh about!
And if flight delays, flight cancellations, rerouting is not your calm/laughter and it blows your skirt/pants up in to a wad…then may I suggest avoiding the whole airline industry completely because no matter how angry you get or entitled you feel….will not do one bit of good and I guarantee it will only make your life even worse, I promise you that!
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today with my fingers and toes crossed for a safe day of travels but always in acceptance of God’s will.
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

A Wish And A Prayer And Another Great Idea!

14 Nov
Dear Readers,

As I sit here reading another true story from the Wall Street Journal about America I couldn’t help but get a another brilliant idea how to solve the problems of millions, you are welcome!..Or at least the anticipated problems of the airlines industry.
Airlines Face Acute Shortage Of Pilots”
Susan Carey, Jack Nicas and Andy Pasztor
“U.S. airlines are facing what threatens to be their most serious pilot shortage since the 1960s, with higher experience requirements for new hires about to take hold just as the industry braces for a wave of retirements.
Federal mandates taking effect next summer will require all newly hired pilots to have at least 1,500 hours of prior flight experience – six times the current minimum-raising the cost and time to train new fliers in an era when pay cuts and more-demanding schedules already have made the profession less attractive….Another federal safety rule, to take effect in early 2014, also will squeeze the supply, by giving pilots more daily rest time.”
I don’t know about you but sign me up for the inexperienced and tired pilot flights! Don’t care where they are going, I’m going their way! 
But with that said…
I totally understand why there might be some who do not feel the same as I do! Asklotta is a giver and I am going to give the airlines industry a brilliant business idea filled with $$$ and I will not charge $150 to make changes to the plan or delay the arrival time of my suggestion… 
Here it is…
…Put all those under trained and tired pilots in a plane but charge 75% less to ticketed passengers who want to fly on a wish and a prayer!…Instead of the inexperienced and exhausted pilots twiddling their thumbs, put those useless pilots back to work and increase the airlines profit margins because this is AMERICA. Since I know how bummed the airlines are about only charging $25 dollars to bring your clothes along with you on a trip, they will drop to their knees with thanks! Or maybe their passengers will be!!!
Or the airlines could charge by the pound….maybe that is for another posting!
You are welcome airlines and America!
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today just chuck full of great ideas to keep America high and in the skies!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

External Situations!

9 Nov
Dear Readers,
Below is a comment I made to a blog called To Be Aware and he responded to my comment. The posting was all about finding the root or source of your unhappiness. And pretty much it all comes down to fear and not taking responsibility
but with that said…My comment basically expressed…great on a simplistic level like weather, delayed planes, a dry cleaning mishap, Halloween, parking ticket, where there is a beginning, middle and end. But what if it goes to a higher level, a higher level of caring, a higher level of continuation that hasn’t ended.
His response… 
“You prevent joy/happiness/moving on for yourself. Nothing external to you can rule your experience of life. It is your choice how to react to changing external situations. No one chooses your attitude besides you.”
I agree with him but my brain did not stop clicking…
…It is time to play the What if game…
What if… 
A Bully, someone/s activity working to hurt you daily (posting October 24, the reader who commented she was bullied in high school and as much as she tried to ignore it, it was impossible to avoid the humiliation and pain. 
A very ill child, A parent’s constant worry, for the cure is beyond their ability 
A terminally ill parent suffering in pain and you are rendered helpless to ease their pain
Imprisoned for a crime you did not comment
And for this is when I say due to the emotions God gave humans (love, empathy, care) I believe external situations can prevent joy/happiness/moving on!
For I believe to have “joy/happiness/moving on” while in the mist of severe and cruel outside forces is to NOT CARE! You simply do not care.  This is the perfect time to quote my brilliant and beauty Mother “The boil on the other man’s ass never hurts.” Well done Mom! or to quote my youngest step-son “solid.”
AND maybe just maybe lacking “joy/happiness/moving on” in our life during certain life altering events and to feel life’s pain (as uncomfortable as it is) is exactly where we need to be in that moment and time. Maybe there is something we are needing to feel, to live (to teach us) to deliver us emotionally and physically where we need to be in the end.
My last two cents worth…If “nothing external to you can rule your experience of life” what would be the point to living life and embracing life’s experiences, the good, the bad and the ugly. For if nothing more life is a collections of adventures or stories as my friend Linda calls them. God would not have given us the ability to love, care, have empathy and to learn if no one else mattered but the me’s! I have to believe God did not give us any un-useful spare parts. 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today always seeking balance and appreciating the stories in my life!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

Barf…Our Choices…Gag…Dry Heave!

8 Nov
Dear Readers,

When I sat down to write this yesterday feeling somewhat like (the day-after hangover) with the presidential election behind us and all I could think of was, I am really really pissed. I am tired of my pounding headache from drinking too much politics. Living in Ohio it felt like a political poisoning!  Our political process is intoxicating and toxic voiding any sense of good or hope. Our phone never stopped ringing from both political parties spouting off something while being inundated with political T.V. slander commercials.
And this is the part that really gets my feathers flapping…Our only choices in this past election was to either pick Financial Socialism while securing gays rights and health care for women, protecting their choices. Or Financial strength with job creations as a priority but yet needing to live in the T.V. series “Mad Men” as if it was 1950’s again with the “little woman” at home contemplating her back alley coat hanger abortion while her best friend is stuck in a closet! 
Furthermore if I see one more damn posting on Facebook with “now is the time to come together” I think I will lose my cookies! It is NOT time to come together! It is not time to abandoning any thoughts of creating a stronger economy, it is not time to accept the trickle down theory for it does not work in creating a stronger more stable economy, it does not create jobs! But It is time to reflect and it is time to get to work in a thoughtful mindful way! 
Both political parties need to throw out the arrogance and stupidity which both parties displayed brilliantly over the last several months and now they have to come together and do right for all Americans! We should not have to choose between a stronger economy and equals rights for all Americans, period end of subject!
I am sadden and extremely disappointed there was not a right choice…Our only choice was what party/President did we fear less and which party/President would do less harm in four years than the other…. 
…That to me that is not hopeful or anything to celebrate (the lesser of two evil choice). 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today asking “not what my country can do for me but what I can do for my country.” 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

A Problem Is A Gift!

7 Nov
Dear Readers,
Yesterday after doing my civic duty to vote in our Presidential  election I trotted off to the mall looking for that perfect white shirt (unsuccessful). But anyway I was in a department store and over heard a conversation in the dressing room that was going on between two women.
One woman was speaking in an unkind judgmental way and I realized and came to understand by her opinions, comments and harsh tones she has led a very blessed life.
I know this sounds crazy but please read on…
I truly believe this woman lacked empathy for others and took a mocking tone regarding someone else’s problems, because her life has been so blessed, shielded and void of life’s true painful experiences…I’m talking about the life altering humbling kind of experiences, the likes of which bring you to your knees coiling in pain….the humiliation of a cheating spouse,  the degradation of being lied to and manipulated for someone’s else own selfish wants, the pain of loving an addict and being rendered helpless to their destructive life and the evil tentacles that reach out from their actions. The kind of pain that either brings you humility and the need for recovery or if you choose bitterness…  
Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.
-Helen Keller
Rarely do we look at our problems as a blessing. Today I think it is really important to look at our problems as an opportunity in our life to grow, to become better, creating an opening to a deeper level of happiness through our painful life experiences! It is always important to be appreciative for our problems for they could always be worse but my thought today takes it a bit further, to a different level of trust…to be thankful for your problems not just appreciative for what they are not!
I believe everything happens for a reason, I need to. For God is a good God and he always has a loving plan for us that he has put together without the help of any of the i-technologies (hard to believe, I know). 
Today’s Reminder:
“The Chinese word for crisis is written with two characters. The first stands for danger, and the second for opportunity. I will look for the good hidden within everything I encounter.”
“There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands.”
-The Courage To Change
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today thanking God for all my problems for the personal consequence would be more severe!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

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