External Situations!

9 Nov
Dear Readers,
Below is a comment I made to a blog called To Be Aware and he responded to my comment. The posting was all about finding the root or source of your unhappiness. And pretty much it all comes down to fear and not taking responsibility
but with that said…My comment basically expressed…great on a simplistic level like weather, delayed planes, a dry cleaning mishap, Halloween, parking ticket, where there is a beginning, middle and end. But what if it goes to a higher level, a higher level of caring, a higher level of continuation that hasn’t ended.
His response… 
“You prevent joy/happiness/moving on for yourself. Nothing external to you can rule your experience of life. It is your choice how to react to changing external situations. No one chooses your attitude besides you.”
I agree with him but my brain did not stop clicking…
…It is time to play the What if game…
What if… 
A Bully, someone/s activity working to hurt you daily (posting October 24, the reader who commented she was bullied in high school and as much as she tried to ignore it, it was impossible to avoid the humiliation and pain. 
A very ill child, A parent’s constant worry, for the cure is beyond their ability 
A terminally ill parent suffering in pain and you are rendered helpless to ease their pain
Imprisoned for a crime you did not comment
And for this is when I say due to the emotions God gave humans (love, empathy, care) I believe external situations can prevent joy/happiness/moving on!
For I believe to have “joy/happiness/moving on” while in the mist of severe and cruel outside forces is to NOT CARE! You simply do not care.  This is the perfect time to quote my brilliant and beauty Mother “The boil on the other man’s ass never hurts.” Well done Mom! or to quote my youngest step-son “solid.”
AND maybe just maybe lacking “joy/happiness/moving on” in our life during certain life altering events and to feel life’s pain (as uncomfortable as it is) is exactly where we need to be in that moment and time. Maybe there is something we are needing to feel, to live (to teach us) to deliver us emotionally and physically where we need to be in the end.
My last two cents worth…If “nothing external to you can rule your experience of life” what would be the point to living life and embracing life’s experiences, the good, the bad and the ugly. For if nothing more life is a collections of adventures or stories as my friend Linda calls them. God would not have given us the ability to love, care, have empathy and to learn if no one else mattered but the me’s! I have to believe God did not give us any un-useful spare parts. 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today always seeking balance and appreciating the stories in my life!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

4 Responses to “External Situations!”

  1. Terri Breen November 9, 2012 at 4:44 pm #

    A huge inspiration for me, is meeting someone who’s experienced “joy crushing” loss, ie: death of a child…and are able to put their lives back together and find meaning from their loss. The introspection it takes to find ” positive meaning” is what allows an individual like this to “move on” and find joy and happiness again.
    I’ve seen TV interviews with individuals who were “wrongly convicted”, spent 20+ years incarcerated, were ultimately vindicated and without bitterness “move on” and use their experience to help others.
    Then there is a subset of people who use their “unhappiness” to manipulate others with their “tales of woe” and forever use a past bad experience as an excuse for bad behavior.
    I like your post Carlotta, but in the end we are as Happy as we WANT to be.

    • asklotta November 9, 2012 at 6:47 pm #

      Thanks Terri, and I agree! But I think what is needed the external situation needs to have an end in order for the healing and lessoned learns can begin. The wrongly imprisoned needs to be set free in order to come full circle. The bullying needs to stop and the rapist caught and punished and I think then is when we are at a crossroads…do we heal and become better or do we turn bitter for our less then perfect world. I really appreciate you took the time to comment…and I agree with you!

  2. Fay Moore November 9, 2012 at 11:24 pm #

    Love, love, love the quote: I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you! Amazingly true!!!!!!

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