Divorcing, A Response from yesterday’s posting!

19 Jul
Dear Readers,
 
I received a few responses from yesterday’s posting titled “Divorcing”. Most of them to my email address for it touched a personal note and they wanted to reach out to me in a more private setting and could not believe the perfect timing of my post.
 
Below is a comment I received and with the permission of the author is today’s posting. So with that said please read on for it eloquently sums up what respect can and will do (it turns coal in to diamonds.) Proof, living proof of what happens when grown-ups act like grown-ups instead of jealous revengeful spoiled children and make the conscious decision (please believe me, it is a decision) to divorce with dignity not because it is easy but because it is a win, win in the long run!
 
“AMEN, Lotta!
<> 
You can say that again, the need to respect the fact that the rules that existed during a marriage become null and void due to a new nuance. I’ve never heard it put so well! And the outcome when this fact is actually respected … HARMONY! 
 
And there’s only one route to get there. It’s called the high road. My mother took the high road when my Dad left her for another woman. She never once said a negative thing about my dad after their divorce. She never once said the words “child support” or “money” or “your dad did blankety-blank-blank to me” or “if your dad hadn’t left me…” or “your dad won’t pay for that so you can’t do it.” 
 
She never said one negative thing about my stepmom (and from my experience and observation it’s the insecurity of the bio-mom that starts the name-calling and/or bad relationship between a bio-mom and a stepmom — so here’s to you, Mom!). 
 
My mother gave me the freedom to love my stepmom. And guess what — I love my mother even more for it. So, my parents gave me the gift of harmony within their divorce, and the gift of many holidays with all three of them. Open minds create open hearts.
I am eternally grateful for my parents’ maturity and restraint through some tough years. If there was anger, I wasn’t aware. If there was hurt, I wasn’t aware. If there was sadness, I wasn’t aware. They knew I had things to do, friends to meet, football games to attend, boyfriends to date, parties to throw, homework to do, and life to live. They were not going to allow their divorce to be a weight on my shoulders. So, thanks, Mom and Dad, for that loving gift of freedom.
 
I still have my parents. They’re 88, soon to be 89. I lost my stepmom recently and would give anything to have her back. But God works in mysterious ways. Instead of my mom and dad living their lives out alone, they like to spend their time together with me. We yuck it up, laugh about the past, try to figure out my brothers, go on rides, and we all miss my stepmom. How’s that for life going full circle? It’s the payoff for two people taking the high road. We all win!
 
Thanks, Asklotta! You made my day! I hadn’t thought about all this in a while.”
 
 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today filled with gratitude my former husband and I took the “high road” created new rules and boundaries that were honored and respected which created a clear new path for moving forward, past the hurt with dignity, to reach the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow (“Harmony”.) I only remember the good times with my previous husband and if I live to 100, I will always be grateful for the children he gave me. 
 
And with that said…
 
I am truly madly in love with my husband; love all of my seven children (regardless of their DNA.) I will always remain hopeful for the dignifying divorce, “the gift of harmony” will become a chic new trend in the future because it works!
 
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
 
Kindest regards,
 
Asklotta
 
President and CEO
 
CBCorp
Image 
 
 

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