50 Shades of bad writting!

21 May
Dear Readers,
My sister and I were talking one morning (as we always do) and she wanted to know why we haven’t discussed the book 50 Shades of Grey that became an overnight Internet success and a national phenomenon.  I said calmly with clarity, because I haven’t read the book due to some pretty bad reviews. TT said, don’t you think its our responsibility to read a book that has swept the nation, a book that has become more popular then any other “romance novel” don’t you want to know why? She went on, The Twilight books got teenage girls reading again, Harry Potter got children and adults reading again. She said what is it about 50 Shades of Grey do you think that is making it so popular and keeping women up to all hours of the night reading… even women well in to their 70’s and 80’s? Well when she put it that way, O.K. (I do love current events)…. Let me warn you, I made a bad mistake regarding my sister’s idea!
50 Shades of Grey
By E. L. James
Genre- Erotic Fiction
First – The book is simplistically written.  Not a well-written book by any great stretch of the imagination, lacking in character development, lacking a plot and redundant to boredom…. Basically, the literary equal to the Kardashian’s
Second – As a mother of two daughters it is greatly disturbing that this book is so popular. 
Third – As a woman I find it disturbing that this book is so popular.
Fourth – My oldest daughter said, 50 Shades of Grey has benefited from the Internet “jumping on the band wagon” mentality but the popularity could be based on stupid people mistaking the feeling of uncomfortable for great works of art…. it is just poorly written.

Fifth – If I had to read Ana saying “my inner goddess” one more time I thought I would lose my cookies all over the book
Sixth – My sister is on MY “book recommendation” probation list…AND please knows this is not the first time I’ve placed HER there!!!
Seventh – The second book in the trilogy I’ve been told by a friend is even more boring and even more redundant then the first. As my friend said, “I’m half way through and I probably won’t finish it because it’s so boring.”
The book begins with the first six chapters like any other romance novel.  The virgin girl (Anastasia Steele) who is just a few days away from her college graduation meets the most handsome, extremely wealthy (billionaire) man (Christian Grey) by mishap. Ana’s roommate Kate comes down with the flu and sends Ana in her place to interview Christian Grey for their college newspaper. It took Kate months to get the interview and she didn’t want to pass up the opportunity plus as luck should have it Mr. Grey is the college’s largest benefactor and will be handing out the diplomas at graduation.  Ana literally falls in to Mr. Grey’s office and in spite of her lack of coordination and her lack of sophistication the billionaire becomes fixated with her.
The relationship is literally and figuratively defined by Christian Grey (Ana needs to sign a non-discloser contract per his lawyer’s advice) Once the non-discloser is signed another contract is presented for her review (mutually agreeing to different acts of bondage and submission) This is by no means a romance by any stretch of the word, clearly just sex between two consenting adults. It is also consenting acts of domination, manipulation and S&M. Ana has to be completely submissive allowing Christian to control what she wears, what she eats, when she sleeps and of course his painful and humiliating sexual pleasures. Philip Galanes (Social Q’s) of the New York Times so eloquently states, “Why would a woman want a man to truss her up like a Christmas turkey, and never do any trussing in return.”
In my opinion 50 Shades of Grey has less to do with sexual (erotic) content (though there is a lot) and more to do with the extreme and life long damage of abuse and rape.  An older woman (his mother’s friend) used Christian Grey when he was a young teenager to play out her sexual fantasies. The “Mrs. Robinson” of the BDSM world. In my opinion she did raped him and hence became as his character said, “ I am 50 shades of fucked up.”

It truly is a boring book! I am scratching my head even more confused regarding my sister’s original question…why is 50 Shade of Grey so popular?…Not a clue! 
Asklotta and staff will MIND YOUR BUSINESS today advising everyone to not waste fifteen dollars or time on this garbage, but if for some reason you still want to read 50 Shades of Grey (even though I am sure there are better written erotic fiction to read) then just look in the trash…because that is where I threw mine as I am sure other copies have gone.
The one thing that did surprise me the most regarding this book, the author is a woman.  I guess women have reached true equality with men in the literary sector…the true lack of knowing what women truly want!
And as for my sister please know, as I say with a smile and with all the love in my heart, I WILL get her back!
Again, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
Present and CEO

20 Responses to “50 Shades of bad writting!”

  1. Rhonda May 21, 2012 at 1:39 pm #

    I haven’t read the book; It had crossed my mind to do so; thanks for saving me the trouble.

    • asklotta May 21, 2012 at 2:58 pm #

      Thanks for your comment! I love reading and especially in the romance novels in the summer…this is not it, not worth your time or money!

  2. introvertedblogger May 22, 2012 at 10:49 am #

    I didn’t make it past the first chapter. It was so badly written I couldn’t go on.

    • asklotta May 22, 2012 at 5:49 pm #

      Right…its just bad writing! How did it get so popular without someone being honest? Just don’t get it!

      • IntrovertedSarah June 12, 2012 at 1:26 am #

        I think a lot of that is as you said, jumping on the wagon. Some of it is that it’s erotica being brough out of the bedsheets.

      • asklotta June 12, 2012 at 4:43 am #

        You are correct!

  3. Lalalalisa May 24, 2012 at 4:17 pm #

    I listened to the audiobook and finished it because we are reading it in our book club. But I REALLY disliked it. It was like getting TMI from your roommate about the guy she is dating and you can’t stand. I am particularly offended by the controlling stalker types and can’t understand why any woman would find that erotic.

    • asklotta May 24, 2012 at 5:48 pm #

      Exactly! and you stated it perfectly…I felt the same thing…TMI from a roommate that you don’t even like…and the whole stalker is just not a turn on for me!

  4. legionwriter July 6, 2012 at 3:53 am #

    It’s funny – I eavedropped on a conversation between 2 ladies recently who were both riveted by these books. I never even heard them mention the title, but I knew it was the same book by the start of your description. Funny that it sucks so badly, because they were in love with it!

    • asklotta July 6, 2012 at 10:36 am #

      My take away from this whole thing…the only ones that like this book are frustrated middle aged women. What is so disturbing, it is really badly written. Great writing and sex does not have to be mutually exclusive! But it does speak volumes for the Internet and sex!

  5. nyparrot July 19, 2012 at 2:40 pm #

    I was going to read the book, and now I am so not going to… What does it say about the readers, if so many loved reading it?? Also… is a movie, or perhaps even the series, on their way to our TV screens?? HBO is probably all over it…:)

    • asklotta July 19, 2012 at 2:57 pm #

      I think what it speaks volumes about our society. Our standards have been lowered not only in our behavior (how we treat each other), what we view on T.V (awful reality T.V.) and what we read. AND yes sadly I heard it was going to be a movie.

      • nyparrot July 19, 2012 at 3:00 pm #

        Why am I not surprised? lol

      • asklotta July 19, 2012 at 3:11 pm #

        I think it is a good think to be surprised….if not, too jaded.

      • nyparrot July 19, 2012 at 4:48 pm #

        I am way too jaded then..lol

      • asklotta July 19, 2012 at 4:55 pm #


      • nyparrot July 19, 2012 at 5:02 pm #

        No wonder – the less taste and manners people have – the bigger hit they becomes on reality TV. The more dysfunctional you are – the bigger start you’ll become… apparently… lol

      • asklotta July 19, 2012 at 5:58 pm #

        Brilliantly and perfectly stated…so true!

  6. suth2 August 16, 2012 at 4:00 am #

    Thank you for your considered review. I had planned to read it but now I definitely will not. You have saved me some time to read something more worthy.

    • asklotta August 16, 2012 at 10:32 am #

      There is nothing wrong in fact everything right with a great (well written) romance (sex) novel…But 50 Shades is NOT it! Thanks for your comment, I appreciate your time!

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