“Moms of Boys…”

5 Apr
Dear Readers,

This past Sunday I was relaxing and reading the NY Times while the television was on in the background. (On the weekends it feels as if the TV is continuously on, even if no one is in the room. Do not ask me why people walk out of a room without turning it off, this is a concept I have yet to grasp. But I digress…)  Suddenly in the midst catching up on current events, a promo on the television caught my attention. It was an ad showcasing a new upcoming show airing on TLC in April called “Mama’s Boys of the Bronx”.  This program, I promise you, will be the worst show you will ever see. If there was a category in the “People’s Choice Awards” for the most tasteless, awful, mindless, and most dysfunctional portrayal of a family in America,”Mama’s Boys” would would take home the statue. Hands down.  By comparison, this show makes The Jerry Springer show look like educational programing (I kid you not). The premise is a train-wreck: grown sons still living with their mothers and all of their highly dysfunctional relationships with their mothers and for that matter, with themselves! 

Now, with that said, it reminded me of an article by Jenny Isenman,  “Moms of Boys Are Jealous Shrews, So Here’s a  Contract for Your Son’s Future Wife.“,  you can read the full article http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jenny-isenman/moms-of-boys_b_1320116.html   This article alone could single handedly scare young women into making marriage a thing of the past. 
The article was written from the perspective of a loving and protective mother of a five year old son who just wants life to stand still. We’ve all been there. But after seeing the promo of “Mama’s Boys of the Bronx”, the article seems more like the top pick on the required reading list for ambitious mothers who want to be the star of their own reality freak show. 
In the article, Jenny Isenman creates a Mother in-law (MIL) Contract for future daughter in-laws to sign before saying “I do” (in addition to the pre-nup). Below you will see an excerpt of the MIL Contract. She truly raises the bar to new heights for helicopter mothering:

1. “I will compliment my mother-in-law’s (MIL) cooking, her decorating, and, most importantly, the incredible way he raised her son, my husband.”
2. “I will acknowledge that my MIL’s son is on loan to me so that we can make grandbabies, which will probably look lie her and have her wonderful traits, which I will mention in conversation frequently and with great fervor.”
3) “Lets take her on vacation with us.”
4) “No, I don’t need to be in the pictures; she didn’t raise me…unfortunately.”
5) “I will spend all holidays with my husband’s family, because they are so awesome and gracious, and I realize how much mine sucks by comparison.”….
Can this get much creeper? YES, only if you read the article in its entirety!  
As a mother of one son, two daughters and four step-sons, I do not find Ms Isenman’s article funny nor do I relate to it in any way, I simply find it disturbing.

She uses such words as “Liar” and “Wench” to describe the future wife of her son. Even joking in this manner is just too creepy for me, too far on the sick side of mother son relationships, it makes my skin crawl. I would hate it if my daughters or their friends, needed to deal with such a jealous over- baring, controlling, manipulative narcissistic mother in-law! Just the thought makes me feel like crying right now! 
Asklotta and staff has come up with a new Mother in-law (MIL) contract as we MIND YOUR BUSINESS.
1) I promise to honor the woman my son has crowned to be his princess, his wife
2) I promise to give you the utmost respect as my son’s wife
3) I promise to always be on your side
4) I promise to help in any way you see fit
5) I promise never to interfere 
6) I promise never to place my son in that an awful position of having to choose between his mother and his wife (only a sick mother would do that)
7) I promise to be grateful for all the happiness you bring my son
My mother would say…“A son is a son until he takes a wife, a daughter is a daughter for the rest of her life.” …and if you play your cards right, his wife will be your daughter for life.

The highest compliment a mother could receive is for her son to be the most wonderful husband and father, to be kind, respectful and loving to another woman (his wife)…. To be able to take care of himself and the ones he loves… and when he marries, to forsake all others, including his mother.
Jenny ends her article with…”You can print this to be signed when the inevitable happens. I just saved you from losing your sweet, sweet boy. You’re welcome.”
I will just end mine with… You’re welcome! 
As always, it has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

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