The Perfect Work Cocktail

16 Mar
Hi Lotta,
I’m a young professional and I’m just starting to get my career off the ground. Overall, it has been fun, exhausting, exciting, and frustrating to say the least. Finding the balance between my work life and social life is a weekly battle, and on top of that, I find it essential to stay healthy and fit, which makes balancing all 3 priorities even harder. I usually feel that successfully juggling all three aspects is nearly impossible and as I intensely focus on one or two things, the third comes crashing down. I understand “a personal relationship will help me you keep your job, win the business,… it can make the difference when times are hard.” I’ve found that for my company and the general business world I’m in, that forging such personal relationships tends to mean a lot of happy hours (that sometimes turn into bar hopping).  To be honest, I’m not a big drinker and I don’t feel healthy (nor can I get a workout in after work) when I start drinking at 5:00 in the afternoon. Furthermore, I don’t like to drink more than a couple times a week, which means, more social drinking with my office takes away my desire to be social and drink with my friends on the weekends. In addition, I wonder how to walk the line between showing my co-workers a more fun side of me, but at the same time, I believe it’s also important to keep their impression of me professional.   What do you recommend?  
Dear Young Professional,
You have come to the right corporation for your work-social dilemma! Asklotta is an expert on relationships and behavior in and out of the work environment and it will be my pleasure to MIND YOUR BUSINESS and help you navigate through the networking and creating opportunities through relationships and not crossing the lines in to a state of business ruins.
No wonder this country is in a financial crisis, the few that are employed, start cocktails at 5 in the afternoon and don’t stop until bed! Have you heard of the word alcoholic? Asklotta is quite confident that your co-workers are well on their way to a 30 day stay at the Betty Ford Rehab Center. Personal relationship building with co-works does not mean drinking until you fall over, becoming an embarrassment to yourself and others, making the next work day nearly impossible to get through without french fries, a double cheeseburger and hanging your head over a toilet. If it’s true that your co-workers drink as much and as long as they do, it gives the impression that your co-workers do not have a life outside of their work place (lacking a healthy personal and business balance)
I want you to socialize with your co-workers no more then twice a week (max.) You don’t want to get a reputation as an office party girl along with setting the stage for gaining a tremendous amount of weight, including a diagnoses of diabetes….  just because others act inappropriately does not mean you need to mirror their embarrassing/inappropriate behavior. (I’m sure your mother told you this) Please remember while you are out socially with co-workers, it will be for one drink only, you will slowly sip your drink while talking and being an even better listener! In fact, please know, your drink does not have to be an alcoholic drink (turn it in to a social opportunity to hydrate before a workout)..The after hour socializing is all about, making the time to relax with people you work with, in a social setting, to help build connections and build trusting bonds. Setting up limits and boundaries on your “after work hours” will be a win-win for everyone! Once in awhile buy the first round of drinks for your co-workers, quickest way to make a connection and show your fun side!
What should never happen, talking too much about personal information to your co-workers that could damage their respect for you, they are not your therapist and for God’s sake never sleep with your boss…it will ruin any chances of continued employment within your company and shatter any hopes of creating a network full of opportunities…
… I DO NOT want you to be that person!
I can tell you do not have a dog, very wise at this point in your life! I’m advising, do not get a dog! Let me say this one more time, Do Not Get A Dog!!!…. If you think juggling “3 priorities” is difficult, 4 is impossible!
Keep up your work-outs, it is the only thing keeping you sane and enabling you to balance any/all of your daily demands with success plus provides an opportunity to stay connected with healthier minded people…
It has been my pleasure to tell you what to do and what NOT to do!
Kindest regards,
President and CEO

One Response to “The Perfect Work Cocktail”

  1. mschinagle March 16, 2012 at 2:57 pm #

    Asklotta’s pal adds some specific suggestions re cocktail hour: A vodka tonic with lime– no vodka please. It’s cool, elegant, smart and refreshing. And absolutely no alcohol free beer. It tastes awful and you still get empty calories that will make you fat.

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